Some time has passed since my journey to self-discovery forged a trench into the meaning of my search. Traveling the roads of Colombia has led me to see within the measurement of time, a factor to my existence and relevance which is a reality that I never fully grasped, until, I landed right back where I started, in a place within me that I have always called home…. My conscious self!
It has taken many roads through exterior winding country sides, to reach the inlays deep within the mind. Ours is a mind that has always sought a certain level of enlightenment that I know resides in a place deep within. There have been countless hours, days and months of thought upon thoughts, through conversations with my “sub conscious” self, that only my mind, which is constantly evolving, could detail, as “we” arrive at conclusions that only I could decipher, upon acceptance. These thoughts are too real and true to ignore; too alive in me to not finally bring me to a point of awareness that I could not deny.
Even using the roads less traveled, through the endless roads traveled in my mind, could not have actually prepared me for the depth of what I have come to understand. It has taken everything that I am, to play its part and unfold an opening revealed in the truth that is me. A truth I can barely understand, much less try to share as knowledge, with all its haunts, which consumes every corner of my daily existence.
AND YES! … Once again time has conspired to unite all that was, with all that is and all that will be…..and I AM… simply along for the ride!
Life is rarely disappointing when you are willing to hold on to it for dear life, ignite the presence within and express ultimate purpose! It is a hell of ride every day to exist in a world that is vast yet small, infinite and finite all at the same time. Even when the venture is never further than my own inner thoughts, within the folds of deeper thoughts of consciousness, life shows how extraordinary and unbelievably incomprehensible it is.
Yet, the more I discover, the more I want to be within all of its wonder, till it unfolds all that I desire and require. To sit here, even more still than “present,” without journeying through time, to be in the folds within my thoughts, and nourish the parts unknown and yet somehow familiar gives me a purpose, I never anticipated.
We live within the unconscious emotions of life, a place where survival comes into play every time we breathe, more often without conscious thought or even so much as a question as to its origin. We seek to find and then we hide out of fear, the very discoveries within ourselves of the greater truths that define our existence. We seek refuge by creating illusions projected out in time, so that our experience of life makes sense. Yet, we are born into a senseless world that we never understand, as we exist to survive. We inherently create a world that alters our own perception of truth, so that we can witness our physical reactions to our make believe discoveries, as we perceive them to be truth, those truths that we then determine, justify who and what we think we are. We hurt, we bleed, we cry, we suffer … but is this quintessentially our truth? Moreover, does the universe, which created us, actually owe us an explanation?
What I have collected as thought through this journey, has taken me time within a non physical space; it’s a discovery of a non-physical truth that is veiled and illusive. It exists in a time that is condensed within my mind, which I cannot fully and eloquently decipher, but is more real, then any reality I can conjure.
To my ignorance I give in and state, “We have no control over life or time,” and all of our existence is an illusion that conceals a greater truth we are meant to reveal.
Life is in ways as predestined as it is free of so called destiny. We organize and form the basis of our understanding of existence as something that happens outside of us, while we remain present in every thought that exists within us, which then contradicts, even our own understanding of life’s specific meaning for us. Life is a dichotomy within a structure that is illusionary yet susceptible to life.
My uncovering of these thoughts within my thoughts has led to understanding a principle which lives within a realm of lower existence in me. A realm that I now know, I have allowed to supersede my own higher consciousness! This gives me permission to create the illusion of a belief; that life is happening by me through the terms I prescribe to it, as I rise to the challenge of survival to evolve within it, while ignoring the very meaning of the higher consciousness in me.
This might be a good place to clarify what Higher Consciousness means to me.
Higher consciousness is a state of elevated awareness and perception in which a person has a deeper understanding of the nature of reality, the self and the various spiritual aspects of life that play an important role in one’s personal evolution, psychological development and spiritual enlightenment.
It is the, “Who am I” question, within the question of life!
This question has led me to recognize something I know but have failed to comprehend, as I go about the business of creating life for myself. I am not the creator of life. I am a participant in the greatest most intricate existence of being in its detailing of its own existence and if I were to truly acknowledge this, I would know that my evolution is the evolution that life seeks to experience itself.
It is an experience steeped in many scenarios that creates many responses for the various challenges it faces no matter what the consequences may be. Life makes allowances for these consequences which can be evaluated through their many different results, as they unfold, while the one thing that persists within every aspect of evolution is “being.” Life seeks to know itself through the joy of knowing that it is. It is alive to constantly evolve and discover its best possibility for the greatest good. Think about it! Life does not labor in labor for the sake of labor; it finds the best reason for its evolution. It finds joy to continually create something new and exciting as it evolves to a higher purpose of itself to serve where it is going in its higher realm. Life simply cannot evolve without a reason for being, which is the thrill of what that prospect could be!
Writing and processing this, is cathartic and liberating on so many personal levels; a torturous labor to revisit with clarity and to be able to communicate on another level, more so a confounding practice to live by, with all its truth and fullness.
By growing consciously into higher consciousness, the universe comes increasingly into being, and synthesizes the one and the many, the ego and eco, the individual and interdependence of all things, for the purpose of evolving itself to be a better version of self. And to do so, life just evolves with one perspective in its minds eye, and that is to express joy within itself as in creating in continuum, knowing it can.
“When the creative power of the universe becomes conscious of itself, it manifests as joy. You do not have to wait for something “meaningful” to come into your life so that you can finally enjoy what you do. There is more meaning in joy than you will ever need. The “waiting to start living” is one of the most common delusions of the unconscious state. Expansion and positive change is more likely to come into your life if you can enjoy what you are doing already, instead of waiting for some change so you can start enjoying what you do.” ~ Eckhart Tolle
Take a breath, process my analysis and the words of Tolle and come to your own conclusion!
HAVE YOU BEEN HAPPY THAT YOU ARE ALIVE? WHAT HAS THAT PROMISE HELD?
If you are happy (regardless of what consequences you find yourself in) then this is your truth, this is where you are meant to be today, evolving a better version of yourself.
Moreover, the time is perfect to face your own higher consciousness and to love yourself beyond what is your physical reality. Finding joy in your purpose to just exist as part of this grand evolution that you are in, be it conscious or unconsciously, is a part of a higher consciousness that is there within you.
I know it takes time to adjust your brain! But right now you should be saying, hmmm, not so far-fetched…. to find the freedom to finally concede that there is a higher consciousness (and yes I draw no line between Universe, Spirit, God and Consciousness) that is always trying to teach the lessons needed to personally evolve, within an evolution that has always existed.
This is, for me, the ultimate release of the stress of survival and the acceptance of living. Having this knowledge brings me the greatest joy, knowing that higher consciousness has my back, and is there for my very personal highest evolution, if I submit to its unfolding pattern and its pursuits within me.
Can you see how this entire awakening of knowledge can transform you?!
Can you learn something from the fact that it is not what happens to you (though you do need the experience of it to decipher it), but that it is how you grow from each experience of what happens to you, that gives you the greatest opportunity to be happier in your pursuit of living life to the fullest?!
Allow this greater understanding to unfold within your thinking daily, within everything at every moment of your day. Find that higher understanding and expression through thoughts of bringing the joy alive in you!
Fully accept that life was pre-destined to evolve within and through you. Separate from the emotional judgments you prescribe to each life event and to what you are experiencing. Witness the destiny in your life! In other words, stop being centered in the thought of your own self-survival!
Life is a dance, which requires an acceptance of what is happening, as it is happening, without the need for judging as it IS happening to YOU. Always bear in mind that Life is also happening to everyone in your presence as well. PROCESS THIS! It will leave you with only one conclusion; your destiny is parallel to your life, but only in terms of how you perceive it and your willingness to evolve within it. This is what the ancients have been awakening in us, through their call for higher consciousness in awareness, faith, religion, and philosophy!